Modest is Hottest?

"As Christians, one of our chief commitments should be not only preserving our own purity, but also protecting and honoring the purity and morals of others."

-Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth

     Modesty. Every teenage girls' favorite lecture. Ha. We definitely hate this talk, both having to give it and receiving it. But why? What about this topic is so controversial? Our human nature, ruled by the flesh, and therefore prone to rebellion, leads us to choose disobedience rather than choosing to glorify God and follow his commandments for us.

    I guess to begin we need to get at the heart of the issue. What is our motivation for how we dress? And does it really matter? So many times I hear girls complain about having to cover up, guys should be able to control their eyes and thoughts better. But ladies let's be honest, we are just as easily distracted when a guy does not dress modestly (whoops the secret is out, girls are attracted to boys and struggle with temptation, too). I am not saying that all the responsibility should rest on us as women, but there is balance to be found.

    The largest obstacles in the pursuit of purity, because that's really what modesty is about, purity of heart, mind, and body, are the lies we choose to believe. We sometimes choose to believe that our worth is based on the number of boys chasing after us, or that we need to dress a certain way (usually more revealing) in order to captivate and hold on to them. In a lot of ways we are the ones pursuing after the guys' hearts and affections (which really is based in lust). So, if their attention is based on your outward appearance, what happens when you age? What happens if you are in a terrible accident and no longer look the way you once did? What is the foundation of that relationship?

    As Christians, we should act out of love, not selfishness. We abide by certain restrictions in order to experience true freedom. Just as there are guardrails on a road to protect us from danger, we place guardrails in our life in order to protect ourselves and others. If I know that a certain blouse is going to cause my Christian brother to stumble, why would I wear it? As his sister in Christ, shouldn't I be willing to limit my freedom to wear that top in order to truly love him and support him? He has a responsibility to respect me as well, to be careful of how he looks at me and treats me, but as a Christian I'm going to support him in that.

   I do not say this to condemn, or to be legalistic. I also do not expect those who do not know Christ to live by these principles either. I just ask that we (as believers in Christ) be aware of motivations and that we love each other as Christ loves us. He died on a cross, giving up everything and completely casting aside his freedom that we may experience true grace and mercy. Freedom is not found because we can do anything we want, that is what causes us to be slaves to sin, true freedom is found in living a life for Christ. I ask that we view modesty through this same lens.

    Ladies, I will not deny that is a wonderful thing to be called beautiful, and to receive compliments when you have put in effort, sometimes hours even, on your outward appearance. But Proverbs tells us that charm and outward beauty will fade. Be a woman who is beautiful on the inside as well. It is such a fulfilling experience when a man compliments you on the things of the heart. Be servants, full of kindness and gentleness, all of which come from a love for the Lord. Find your identity in Christ first, and the rest will come.